Just a few things I read this a couple of days ago about reactive/proactive:
"Our behaviour is a function of our decisions, not our conditions". If we choose to blame others for our conditions, we become reactive.
"Proactive people are driven by values - carefully thought about, selected and internationalised values" while "Reactive people are driven by feelings, by circumstances, by conditions, by their environment".
* There's nothing I can do. * That's just the way I am. * He makes me so mad. * They won't allow that. * I have to do that. * I can't. * I must. * If only.
* Let's look at our alternatives. * I can choose a different approach. * I control my own feelings. * I can create an effective presentation. * I will choose an appropriate response. * I choose. * I prefer. * I will.
The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey